Hello! I’m Maris (rhymes with Paris)

I’m happy you decided to stumble upon this little blog.

I’m a thirty-something California girl, married to my middle-school crush and a toddler mama.

I like to write things.

Visit my other attachment blogs at inaroomdownstairs.wordpress.com (my creative writing space, click on the “blog” tab) and spitupandhiccups.home.blog (my parenthood space).

Initially I started this blog because I felt like a loser.

More on that in a bit.

Around age 21, I was at war with myself. My lifestyle choices up to then were a little bit risky. It thrilled me to make the bad decisions I was making, even though those decisions had terrible repercussions that still haunt me to this day.

But then I started feeling this incredible pull to start living my life a different way. Even though the temporary thrill of my bad decisions was there, at the end of the day I’d find myself unhappy, and I didn’t know why.

So I started living differently. I made some changes. I stopped drinking and partying and doing all the things young people do.

Now back to the loser part.

Because of all these changes I often found myself on the outside looking in, and I really hated it. I was feeling incredibly left out, by my friends, classmates, coworkers, and even family. I questioned why I stopped doing all the things I used to do in the first place.

So I started this blog.

But then I discovered something along the way: It’s not about me. It’s not about my lack of everything I once had. It’s about the reason why I felt the need to change. It’s about sharing that reason with others. It’s about challenging the damaging parts of my character, about fighting the bad traits that come naturally to me. But fighting not of my own power, oh no. I tried and miserably failed at that. I had to trust in Another, I had to learn to fight with faith.

I used past tense there, but I’m still learning to do all that.

I want this space to chronicle my journey, my struggles, the lessons I learn, the people I reach, and most importantly the hope I find amidst all my internal turmoil and the darkness that enshrouds the world.

I really hope you stick around, and more importantly, I hope we learn something from each other and continue learning together.

Much love,


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